Archive for August 31st, 2010
Different Ways of Grieving
Everybody will grieve for a loss in their life in many different ways. Grief is as unique as your are, so don’t compare yourself to others and expect to grieve the same way. Some of your friends or family members may grieve faster, or not show as much pain or emotion, so you wonder if there is something wrong with you. Loved ones may tell you that you are silly or even dumb for grieving over the loss of just a “pet”. Don’t listen or pay attention, obviously they have never had a strong bond with a companion animal and cannot understand what you are feeling right now. Find solace in the fact that grief is a necessary part of life and is very normal, even though the symptoms may vary greatly with each person. Certain reactions to death of a loved one are quite common, and you can expect to experience some of them:
1. Shock. You may go into shock and even find yourself denying that your loved one is gone. 2. Anger. You may feel angry towards the Vet who could not save your pet. You may even feel anger toward your pet for leaving you. And you may feel guilty that this anger will not go away. 3. Guilt. We feel guilty for a number of reasons. You may feel you could have prevented the death or should have been present to say “good-bye”. 4. Feeling of helplessness. You may feel many additional losses – you lost your friend, your companion, your confidant. These additional losses can leave you feeling helpless and confused. 5. Depression. Even normal, committed, caring people may find that they don’t care about anything or anyone right now. Other feelings you may experience are: Sad, worried, scared, unprepared, cheated, relieved, exhuasted, or just plain empty. There are many more. Just be aware that your emotions may be stronger and deeper than usual and may be mixed together in ways you have never experienced before. All of these are normal and will get better with time. The best thing to do is to share your feelings with someone who has experienced this kind of loss before so you can get some emotional support. Don’t try to hold in your feelings, but express them in ways helpful to your circumstances right now. Pet Headstones are a personal way to pay tribute to your lost loved one and to help with the healing process.
Grieving a loss
Grieving can be very different for everyone. It is as individual as you are, and you will grieve differently from your friends and even your close family members. It is also not just common among adults, but very small children can grieve as well. Grief is an emotional, physical and spiritual response to a death or a loss in your life. Grief hurts, but is is a necessary response to loss, change or disappointment. It is very natural and highly individual. Each time you grieve for someone or some loss in your life, it may be different. Your current grief will be influenced by your age, your religious beliefs, previous experiences and your relationship to the person or pet you have just lost. The age and circumstances of the deceased will also influence how you grieve.
When death or a loss turns your world upside down, grief is the process necessary to help you put it all back together again. There are many symptoms to grief, and you may experience them differently with each loss in your life. Sometimes we don’t grieve over a loss of another person as intensely as we grieve over the loss of a beloved pet. Some people describe grief happening in stages, but it may also feel more like “waves” or cycles that come and go depending on what you are doing at this time of your life.
The grieving process takes time and the healing process happens slowly and gradually. Allow yourself time to heal and don’t be critical of yourself. Create a personal tribute or a Pet Memorial to your lost loved one. Include in it your feelings, the things you did together and the time you shared with one another.